#header-inner img {margin: 0 auto !important; #header-inner {text-align: Center ;} Fiji Coupfourpointfive: A reader's perspective on the arrest of the year

Monday, October 4, 2010

A reader's perspective on the arrest of the year

A fictional look at the events that took place from last Friday until today.

Actors: Rajendra Chaudhry Mahendra Chaudhry and the five men arrested with him - Sanjeet Maharaj, Ganga Dharan, Gajraj Singh, Abhay Raj Singh, Shammi Kapoor 

The night before the meeting, around the kava bowl:

Sanjeet Maharaj: Barka (endering word used by Labour party supporters to each other) tum sure hai hum log beyaan meeting karega.

Translation: Barka you sure we going to have the meeting tomorrow. 

Mahen Chaudhry: Hah, aabi barwa overseas hai tho kuch mange kare. Tab hum log ke supporters boli hum log kuch odoom karta.

Yes while the idiot is overseas we have to do something. only then will our supporters have faith that we are doing something and will gain us support. 

Rajen Chaudhry: But dad, phir se hum log court jayega. Hum taak giya tumar wasteen kaam kare benaa paisa. Humar paas be family hai aur reccession chale abhi.

But dad we going to court again. I'm tired of representing you in court for nothing. I have to support too during this recession. 

Ganga Dharan: A reh Rajen, tum sab time kali apaan baire me sochta, tumar bappa ke wasteen kabhi kabhi socho be.

Oh Rajen, you always think of yourself, try and think of your father too sometimes. 

Rajen Chaudhry: Dad this is the last time really, that I'm going to represent you.

The day of the meeting:

Mahen Chaudry at a farmer's home: Accha baiyo ...agar koi poochi konchi hoye yaha pe, bolna hum kali aiya nagona piye. Tum log sab jaanta hum ketna concerned hai ke konchi hoye humara dess mei. Bainimarama hum log ke dess naass kardees. Edam tatti kardees. Kuch mange kare yaar.

Ok brothers, if anyone asks what we are doing here, tell them we just drinking kava. You all know how concerned I am about what's happening to our nation. Bainimarama has destroyed Fiji. it's full of shit now and we need to do something. 

Gajraj Singh: Barka, tum batao konchi kareke hai, hum log sab ke rally kare ga, worry nai karo.

Barka you tell us what we should do and we will rally everyone. 

Sound of police sirens 

Sanjeet Maharaj: A reh, kaun mama log ke boo laidees yaar.

Who called the police. 

Abhay Raj: Chupe baito aur tamaku pio. Hum jai ke baat karega mamu log ke.

Sit quiet and finish you cigarette. I will go talk to them. 

Inspector  Tevita Kutu: Oi what you people doing here?

Sanjeet Maharaj: What's the matter gang?

Inspector Kutu: I said what's going on over here. Don't try to bullshit me. I know what's going on here eh. Where's Chaudhry, tell the fulla come out here or I come inside.

Rajen Chaudhry comes out: io tavale, what's the matter.

Inspector Kutu to his fellow officer Baku: Raica dokadoka, nona tavale noqu sona.

See this one, calling me his brother-in-law, brother-in-law my ass. 

Inspector Kutu to Rajen: Where's your father, tell him come out here. This is an illegal meeting and I'm arresting all of you people right now.

Rajen Chaudhry: Under what section of the law officer.

Inspector Kutu: For breaching the public emergency regulations. Don't ask me what section, you think I'm stupid. 
Now all you people get into the van.

Rajen Chaudhry: Not me officer, I have only just arrived.

Friday night at the police station:

Sanjeet Maharaj to Mahendra Chaudhry: Barka aab konchi hoi.. Hum log ke peetee tab konchi karega.

Barka what's going to happen now. They going to beat us up.

Mahen: Worry nai karo, koi nai peete. Main hoon na. Kuch poochi tum log kali bolo ki hum log nagona peeta raha.

Don't worry, no one will beat you. I'm here to protect you. If they question you keep saying we were only drinking kava. 

Sanjeet Maharaj: Barka hum log tume trust karte aiya hai aaj tak. Tum agge peeche tho nai kare ga hum log ke saat .....naito hum log sab ke batai dega tum kaha India wala paisa chup paya hai.

Barka we have always trusted you, and hope you won't leave us in the dust. If you do, we will reveal where you hid the milliions of dollars you got from India. 

Mahen: A reh bachao humar chaati peerae. Jaldi koi ke boolao hum abhi nai mangta mare.

Please help, my chest is paining. Call someone quick, I don't want to die yet. 

Sanjeet: A reh barka wait karo Shammi bolae. Letho floor pe hum CPR aur mouth to mouth karta.

Oh barka Shammi is calling someone, lie on the floor I will apply CPR and mouth to mouth. 

Inspector Bolekava arrives: What's the matter. You Indians can't sit still, always bothering us while we playing cards.

Shammi Kapoor: Boso help Chaudhry please, his chest paining.

Inspector Bolekava: Real pain or bullshit kind. You sure not gas in the stomach.

Shammi: I dunno. But see he on the floor and Sanjeet giving him CPR.

Inspector Bolekava: Wailei trues up. Ok I'm calling the ambulance to take him to Suva Private.

Ambulance arrives to take Mahen to the hospital, he was given some gas release medicine and sent back to the police station.

The whole weekend passes ...then Monday 

Inspector Kutu: OK get up get up. Man you people boica saraga. No bath all weekend eh. Smell like curry baigani

Ok get up, gosh you people stink so much. smell like curry eggplant. 

Officer Baku and other officers laugh 

Inspector Kutu: Ok get in the van, you people going to court now.

Mahen: But can I brush my teeth first and put on some perfume.

Inspector Kutu: Wailei whoose gonna smell you, just get in the van. Toothbrush too expensive and no datoon  around.

Outside  the court house:

Rajen Chaudhry to Mahen: Dad worry nai karo, hum log ke admee judge hai, Faizal Koya. Agar release nai kari uske petai lagai ga baad me.

Dad don't worry our own man is the judge. If he doesn't release you he will get a hiding later. 

Mahen Chaudhry: Tab tho set hai. Uske batao hum log ke chordo tab phir ek deen uske hum minister banai dega. 

Oh that it's all set. Tell him let us go and I will make him a minister one day. 

In the judge's chambers: 

Rajen to Faizal: Tab kaise janaye barka, tum kar payega?

So you think you can pull it off. 

Faizal Koya: Patani yaar, tum janta agar Barwa ke hawa lag ge, hume aacha se dandaa dei.

I don't know man, you know if Bainimarama finds out, he will make sure I get the stick. 

Rajen: Tum uske baire me worry nai karo. Kali ee kaam kardo, humar bappa baire jai ke saab set kar dei. Aur agar tum hum log ke mircha kara, taab tum dekna.

Don't worry about that, my father will fix everything when he is out. And if you backstab us, then watch out.   

In the court room no plea was entered ..... Faizal released his barkas on bail and excused himself because he was poo-pooing his pants.


Anonymous said...

Whoever made this transcript, must be a very close "ex-lover" of Chaudhry who knows inside out of the man!!!!

The way the trascript has been done, it can very much pass as reality.

I had commented earlier that this meeting was indeed a stunt as a planned political campaign and heroism stunt to his supporters that see Chaudhry is doing something.

And Victor Lal gave credit to Chaudhry for credit where it is due? No, this ficticious trascript more resembles the reality.

You have to know the lot of them to ome up with such a realistic transcript.

Boy you have beaten Fiji Times but at least you have declaring it to be ficticious, when Fiji Times don't!!

Jope said...

hahahaha this is so hilarious and real!

heee heee said...

barking funny

Anonymous said...

Like the Taliban we need to unite with Chaudary to defeat the great Satan, Banimarama.

I urge every citizen, both Fijian and Indian to put aside their differences for now and work together to dismantle these crinimals in the junta and send them to jail forever.

So sad to watch the Commonwealth Games and not see our young people competing.Our country and future are being held to ransom by this corrupt Bainimarama,his corrupt junta and totally misguided military.

Voreqe,Ganilau,Nailatikau, Khaiyum, Naivalurua, Nailatikau, Kubuabola, Ah koy and company are unashamedly all enjoying the illegal perks of the coup.High salary,overseas trips and so forth whilst our youngsters cannot travel and participate in the games because of their greed for power.

I am so angry with these criminals and those who are hiding behind the gates at QEB. Sa rui datuvu ka vakasisila na mataivalu nei Bainimarama ni sega ni tiko e dua na sotia savasava me tarovi koya.Na vuaviri oqo e sa rui tawayaga ka sa mai vuca sara vakalevu na utona.

O Bainimarama,e sa rui tamata lawakica ka laurai ni kawa ca dina.Nona cakacaka voli mai na 2006 oya me vakamaduataki keda vakalevu na kawa i taukei i vuravura taucoko.

Sa vakaivei oi kemudou na vo mai na keba? E sa vakamalumalu taki kemou vakadua na vosa yame kei na lavo duka nei Setani Bainmarama ka sa mai dula tu na gusu?

My advice to all the soldiers in the Fiji military is to be wise and think carefully about their future.There is still time to redeem themselves by arresting all those crooked military officers including Bainimarama who have ruined so many lives and brought shame to the military and country.

The public will support and pardon all those servicemen and women who will rise up and perform their real duty to the citizens of Fiji by putting down the wicked Bainimarama bring an end to his insane and corrupt coup.

Anonymous said...

Anon 5.57; The purportedly one crime Bai committed during mutiny when the war was declared at the nation and personally to him, he supported the return of country to democracy in 2001.

But people who really were not after proper democracy were after his blood throghout.

Why then have public like you not supported Bai and his goons to having performed their duty on issue by issue basis that gives a reason to return where they belong.

If we call for all to be locked up on one hand and expect others to go out and murder and be pardoned by the citizens under your leadership, then where goes the slogan that law must be followed at all times?

Why don't you do the same and take legal action on their illegal existence? At least there will not be any blood on your hands!

One thing I have seen too much is no one is campaigning to show the path to return to barracks and this is why there is a prolonged stay in power by the goons with no hope of future in sight.